Seeking Happiness

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they are not on your road doesn’t mean they got lost – Dalai Lama

To have succeeded and have lived a good life…

To laugh often and win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. That is to have succeeded.- Ralph Waldo Emerson

How to win friends and influence people

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

• Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.
• Give honest and sincere appreciation.
• Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Six Ways to Make People Like You

• Become genuinely interested in other people.
• Smile.
• Remember that a person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
• Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
• Talk in terms of the other person’s interest.
• Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

• The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
• Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say “You’re Wrong.”
• If you’re wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
• Begin in a friendly way.
• Start with questions to which the other person will answer yes.
• Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
• Let the other person feel the idea is his or hers.
• Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
• Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
• Appeal to the nobler motives.
• Dramatize your ideas.
• Throw down a challenge.

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

• Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
• Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
• Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
• Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
• Let the other person save face.
• Praise every improvement.
• Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
• Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
• Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.

Do the right thing…

“Never, never be afraid to do what’s right, especially if the well-being of a person or animal is at stake. Society’s punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way.”

― Martin Luther King Jr.

I can sit here today and vividly recall the mistakes I have made. It is the lack of action to protect the helpless that sits with me the longest. I will never forget those times. Today was a sad end to Joe Paterno’s reign at Penn State. Sadly, it could all have been avoided.  I can’t say that I will never let a call to action pass again, I do not know the answer to that, but I will vow to always try to remain strong and act accordingly.  I can only try…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IPM approach thriving despite threats

Appears in Fruit Grower News: Jay Brunner and Mike Doerr

http://fruitgrowersnews.com/index.php/magazine/article/ipm-approach-thriving-despite-threats

Integrated Pest Management (IPM) is a philosophy that applies the principles of ecology, especially population biology, to the management of pests in agricultural or managed systems. IPM considers the impact of actions taken on farm economics, worker safety, the environment and the consumer.

Steve Jobs, Apple Computer Founder, Visionary, RIP (Oct 2011_

“Being the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me … Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful… that’s what matters to me.” – Wikiquote, as quoted in The Wall Street Journal (Summer 1993).

“Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren’t used to an environment where excellence is expected.”

“You can’t just ask customers what they want and then try to give that to them. By the time you get it built, they’ll want something new.” – Inc. Magazine

“Almost everything–all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure–these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” – Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Address

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… the ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.” – Think Different, narrated by Steve Jobs

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” - Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Address

UW Freshman Orientation

Kids are far more capable than we realize and need us less than we think when it comes to everyday living. What they miss and need most is the one-on-one interaction that shows genuine interest in their lives and what they are discovering for themselves in the new environment.

Championship Attitude

Championship Attitude-The Key To Peak Performance
by Leif H. Smith, Psy.D.

What is the difference between elite athletes-those athletes who perform their best on a consistent basis- and other athletes? Elite athletes in every different sport master one thing above all else: championship attitude. This attitude is what separates them from other athletes, and they utilize it during every competition. Elite athletes actually think differently than most everyone else. And, accordingly, they get far different results than most everyone else. So how do they do it? Through mastering the following principles:

1. Exerting appropriate focus

Appropriate focus is always internally directed. Elite athletes understand that their attitude is their responsibility. That may sound simplistic, but it cannot be understated. A large portion of their championship attitude comes from understanding at the outset of sport participation that the one thing that they can truly control is their perceptions of the world. Therefore, events are less important than their views of these events.

Active perception is the key “ingredient” here: To gain a championship attitude, you must be able to filter information in ways that are beneficial to you. Rather than focusing on how difficult the situation is, how painful the loss was, or how good your competition is, try the converse: Think about how hard you have worked to put yourself in this position, how much you can learn from that loss, and how enjoyable it is to compete against the very best. Active perception means that you consciously choose how you want to feel through first choosing how you want to think. Elite athletes master this principle, and thus are prepared for anything that comes their way. They simply do not subscribe to pity, negativity, or pessimism.

1. Love of competition

Love of competition means that you compete solely because you love the challenge of bettering yourself. If you find that you are competing for other reasons (money, fame, reputation) you won’t last as long and you wont do as well. After all, money, fame, and reputation are all fleeting aspects of being an athlete anyway. Today’s stars become yesterday’s news. If you ever stop and analyze why some athletes in different sports enjoy long and fruitful careers, you’ll find that the primary reason is that they love to compete. They love to test their abilities, and to challenge themselves. Elite athletes carry this love of competition with them in everything they do-if you play them in checkers, they will compete in the same manner. If they are learning a new skill, they intend to perfect it. They are “addicted” to bettering themselves, and competition in sport provides the perfect venue for such “addictions.”

1. Process-oriented rather than results-oriented

Elite athletes care less about the end results (winning, points, stats, and standings) than they do the process (doing their best, competing with heart, never giving up). Why? Because the results are not really something that they can completely control. They can score a hundred points in a losing effort. They can hit a record number of home runs and their team never makes it to the world series. They can break a national record-and come in second place. It’s happened before, and it will happen again. Elite athletes are able to keep things in perspective, and thus are able to still enjoy their sport in the midst of a big loss or upset. They do this through focusing more on their effort than the results that their effort brings.

1. Deserving success

Deserving success means that you have done everything in your power to earn the right to succeed in competition. You set the game up to win rather than to lose. Too often today, I see and hear about athletes who feel that winning is a right afforded to them rather than a privilege. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Winning is the end result of deserving success, and is a by-product of putting in the time to do everything within your power to master the fundamentals, principles and strategies of your sport. If you deserve success, you have mastered the following areas of your sport:

• Physical – you are in great shape, and are physically able to excel, despite the rigors of the particular sport
• Fundamentals – if you do not master the basics, how can you really expect to excel?
• Strategy – you understand tactics of your sport, and have a game plan that is flexible enough to allow you to succeed no matter what happens during competition
• Mental – you carry a championship attitude with you into competition, and experience feelings of excitement and exhilaration with regards to the upcoming competition

As you can see, the mental side is merely one aspect of deserving success. Championship attitude is nothing without mastery of the other areas. However, it is also probably the most neglected area of the four I listed. Begin today to master it, and you will be pleasantly surprised at the results.

12 Things Happy People Do Differently

Reposted from: http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/08/30/12-things-happy-people-do-differently/

“I’d always believed that a life of quality, enjoyment, and wisdom were my human birthright and would be automatically bestowed upon me as time passed.  I never suspected that I would have to learn how to live – that there were specific disciplines and ways of seeing the world I had to master before I could awaken to a simple, happy, uncomplicated life.”
-Dan Millman

Studies conducted by positivity psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky point to 12 things happy people do differently to increase their levels of happiness.  These are things that we can start doing today to feel the effects of more happiness in our lives.  (Check out her book The How of Happiness.)

I want to honor and discuss each of these 12 points, because no matter what part of life’s path we’re currently traveling on, these ‘happiness habits’ will always be applicable.

1. Express gratitude. – When you appreciate what you have, what you have appreciates in value.  Kinda cool right?  So basically, being grateful for the goodness that is already evident in your life will bring you a deeper sense of happiness.  And that’s without having to go out and buy anything.  It makes sense.  We’re gonna have a hard time ever being happy if we aren’t thankful for what we already have.
2. Cultivate optimism. – Winners have the ability to manufacture their own optimism.  No matter what the situation, the successful diva is the chick who will always find a way to put an optimistic spin on it.  She knows failure only as an opportunity to grow and learn a new lesson from life.  People who think optimistically see the world as a place packed with endless opportunities, especially in trying times.
3. Avoid over-thinking and social comparison. – Comparing yourself to someone else can be poisonous.  If we’re somehow ‘better’ than the person that we’re comparing ourselves to, it gives us an unhealthy sense of superiority.  Our ego inflates – KABOOM – our inner Kanye West comes out!  If we’re ‘worse’ than the person that we’re comparing ourselves to, we usually discredit the hard work that we’ve done and dismiss all the progress that we’ve made.  What I’ve found is that the majority of the time this type of social comparison doesn’t stem from a healthy place.  If you feel called to compare yourself to something, compare yourself to an older version of yourself.
4. Practice acts of kindness. – Performing an act of kindness releases serotonin in your brain.  (Serotonin is a substance that has TREMENDOUS health benefits, including making us feel more blissful.)  Selflessly helping someone is a super powerful way to feel good inside.  What’s even cooler about this kindness kick is that not only will you feel better, but so will people watching the act of kindness.  How extraordinary is that?  Bystanders will be blessed with a release of serotonin just by watching what’s going on.  A side note is that the job of most anti-depressants is to release more serotonin.  Move over Pfizer, kindness is kicking ass and taking names.
5. Nurture social relationships. – The happiest people on the planet are the ones who have deep, meaningful relationships.  Did you know studies show that people’s mortality rates are DOUBLED when they’re lonely?  WHOA!  There’s a warm fuzzy feeling that comes from having an active circle of good friends who you can share your experiences with.  We feel connected and a part of something more meaningful than our lonesome existence.
6. Develop strategies for coping. – How you respond to the ‘craptastic’ moments is what shapes your character.  Sometimes crap happens – it’s inevitable.  Forrest Gump knows the deal.  It can be hard to come up with creative solutions in the moment when manure is making its way up toward the fan.  It helps to have healthy strategies for coping pre-rehearsed, on-call, and in your arsenal at your disposal.
7. Learn to forgive. – Harboring feelings of hatred is horrible for your well-being.  You see, your mind doesn’t know the difference between past and present emotion.  When you ‘hate’ someone, and you’re continuously thinking about it, those negative emotions are eating away at your immune system.  You put yourself in a state of suckerism (technical term) and it stays with you throughout your day.
8. Increase flow experiences. – Flow is a state in which it feels like time stands still.  It’s when you’re so focused on what you’re doing that you become one with the task.  Action and awareness are merged.  You’re not hungry, sleepy, or emotional.  You’re just completely engaged in the activity that you’re doing.  Nothing is distracting you or competing for your focus.
9. Savor life’s joys. – Deep happiness cannot exist without slowing down to enjoy the joy.  It’s easy in a world of wild stimuli and omnipresent movement to forget to embrace life’s enjoyable experiences.  When we neglect to appreciate, we rob the moment of its magic.  It’s the simple things in life that can be the most rewarding if we remember to fully experience them.
10. Commit to your goals. – Being wholeheartedly dedicated to doing something comes fully-equipped with an ineffable force.  Magical things start happening when we commit ourselves to doing whatever it takes to get somewhere.  When you’re fully committed to doing something, you have no choice but to do that thing.  Counter-intuitively, having no option – where you can’t change your mind – subconsciously makes humans happier because they know part of their purpose.
11. Practice spirituality. – When we practice spirituality or religion, we recognize that life is bigger than us.  We surrender the silly idea that we are the mightiest thing ever.  It enables us to connect to the source of all creation and embrace a connectedness with everything that exists.  Some of the most accomplished people I know feel that they’re here doing work they’re “called to do.”
12. Take care of your body. – Taking care of your body is crucial to being the happiest person you can be.  If you don’t have your physical energy in good shape, then your mental energy (your focus), your emotional energy (your feelings), and your spiritual energy (your purpose) will all be negatively affected.  Did you know that studies conducted on people who were clinically depressed showed that consistent exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft?  (Karate-chop to all the pill poppers’ throats!)  Not only that, but here’s the double whammy… Six months later, the people who participated in exercise were less likely to relapse because they had a higher sense of self-accomplishment and self-worth.

Quality first!

‎”When you’re a carpenter making a beautiful chest of drawers, you’re not going to use a piece of plywood on the back, even though it faces the wall and nobody will ever see it. You’ll know it’s there, so you’re going to use a beautiful piece of wood on the back. For you to sleep well at night, the aesthetic, the quality, has to be carried all the way through.” — Steve Jobs, February 1, 1985